In God, whom I trust
In whose words I praise
In God, I trust, I will not be afraid
What can mortal man do to me?
Ps. 56:1
Trust. This morning as I sit down to write about something that has shaped my life; something that has formed and changed who I am as a person. I see everything in clarity. In crystal honesty. In God whom I trust. And I trust because He loves. These words speak such honesty and such truth; such strength is embedded within these words. . .I am in awe.
A while ago I was going through a rough time. I felt stuck. Everyday was a continuous slew of worse. I felt like a shadow, meandering down the street looking fine but feeling so . . . alone. You know those days when you wake up and nothing changes; there's a pit in your stomach and you feel so apart from everyone - the people nearest you; the familiar faces you confided in; the people that trusted and cared for you; even walking down the street you feel encompassed and encased in loneliness. Perhaps the most heartbreaking, that deep inside your heart you feel apart from yourself. Or at least this is how I felt. I felt like David must have felt when he penned "my God, my god why are you so far from helping me?" (PS. 22)
And Then God spoke. Like a mountain trembling in my soul. I heard Him speak and I soaked up the very simple words He whispered oh so quietly, but that hit me oh so hard within my heart. "Why do you love Me?" The answer was already formed in my heart and I cried it out to him. But then in the silence of the room, He said something that broke my heart. "If you love me, Trust me."
Simple words. Simple Words He stated so long ago. Simple words that changed my world. Simple words that changed my soul.It wasn't that I didn't trust Him before. No, this was more of "Jo, surrender your plans and your desire for you life...and trust me to take care." Trust. It's revolutionized my being. . . .and this summer has been a product of the amount of trust I have placed in God. Where will I be after this summer? I don't know. But I do know, that I will trust in God and that all will be fine.
